Finding a rental accommodation in Chennai

for mom and I has been an experience. Throughout our lives. More so after I became "Filim singer". 

I have been itching to write about the kinda questions mom and I have been facing in singaara, culture-protecting Chennai for a while now (especially after the demise of my grandparents, so lets say, 10 years), but for some reason held back. 

All through my childhood life had been in Adyar/Besant Nagar. Mom never really exposed me to the cruel and insensitive questions that landlords might ask a single woman and a daughter. But I got to know, when we decided my back was breaking driving from Adyar to Kodambakkam and Saligramam, where all the studios were sometimes, up and down, sometime twice in the same day. I'd have just reached home, to get another call for a recording and off I'd go driving the 15 kms to and fro. 

From a no-nonsense area to right in the middle of West Mambalam, because mom suddenly thought it'd be nice to live in an area surrounded by temples and all that. Was a very bad idea, coz we had never really been exposed to a typical area like West Mambalam and with "Maama enna panraaaeerr?" kinda questions. In fact mom hates it if someone calls her Maami.

West Mambalam was also the first time I was introduced to the concept of nosy neighbours. I would have kids come and ask my mom/me, who was that family who came in xyz car, wearing these clothes and had lunch with you and left at 4PM after spending x number of hours? are they relatives?" Clearly this kid was probably asked by his parent to find out :) Also was the first time I knew kids are trained by their parents to find out information from adults in such a manner or to go eavesdrop. (Yes, I know of parents who quietly send their kids to play around other adults who might be discussing something and come back to report on what was spoken of. Gossiping is inculcated in our culture :))

Shortly thereafter we realized West Mambalam was not our kinda area and that the divine temple romance was left behind and off we went into Saligramam. We lived in this house for almost 8 years and had the best ever, God-landlord who was actually a distant relative. After a point, once again, Saligramam to city was becoming tough. None of my friends would ever visit :p coz it was too far away. I was missing too many weddings/events coz I was too tired to drive. And with Arcot Road becoming a darn mess, it was becoming difficult for me to arrive anywhere on time. And I have an OCD issue with that. Driving with my feet on the brakes all the time wasn't my idea of fun driving. 

Cut to the next house in Nelson Manickam Road. The house is beautiful. The landlords live downstairs. Now everything was fine, until the landlord asked me to - 1. Marry his son and 2. Convert to his religion. All within a month of moving in here. I shall refrain from naming which religion because I don't think that would be polite. He says his son must learn how to be hardworking from me and that I am a very good girl. And hence I must marry him :p 

I am telling you, I get into some of the most unreal, ridiculous situations.

So off we go again looking for a house. Here are the questions that we heard from prospective landlords

1. Will you be back home by 9PM latest?

Because all the neighbours are elderly and they want no disturbance in the building. Disturbance isquolto opening lock, opening door and closing door quietly. 

I don't understand how many young people in their 20-s come back home at/before 9 PM. So if we rented this house, I guess mom and I are not allowed to watch a late-night film. 9PM curfew you see. I wonder if they think it's a hostel or a house they are renting. :p

2. Who will visit you?

What they also ask is will Directors/Actors visit you? If you work in the film industry and make any acquaintance, you peers are not allowed to visit you, coz you know, all that people in the film industry can do is hanky-panky all the time :p 

3. We will keep one set of keys with us. 

This was one thing that we were laughing about the most. Why would a landlord want to keep one set of keys for a house rented out to us, beats me. When I told a friend that the landlord said this, she said "Tell them OF COURSE. Only that when you guys go out and return, the house must be spotlessly clean, each day".

4. Will you sing? 

Err. I am a singer. I will have to practice, no? Oh that's not allowed? Ok. Thank God I don't tell people I am a trained Odissi dancer and learnt both Kathak and Odissi. :p (I can almost hear another landlord that I might meet in my near future scream)

5. Why did your father leave you? Where is he now? What is he doing? 

I think "Where is my father now" and "what is he doing" are two questions, the answer of which we both haven't really known and thereafter, wanted to know for almost 26 years. Why would anyone else want to know?

Is your father married to someone else? : No

Affair- a? : Not that I know of. 

Why? : I don't know. (Here I feel like saying I will give you his phone number. Please ask him why he didn't date/have an affair with anyone else after the divorce, etc. etc. etc)

6. How much do you get paid per song?

Here I would like to tell them, would you also like credit card statements, bank account statements service tax and tax papers too? 

Did I also tell you that all us people don't get paid for all these TV appearances on every show that you might see? Everytime I appear on TV the neighbours/watchmen and everyone else believe we'd have made quite a bit. Please also know that there are some gullible people who believe that if a newspaper writes about us, we are paid for the interview :p

7. You are only two people. Why do you need a big house? 

I have never understood this question either. So what if we are two people? We are expected to live in a cubby-hole?

[I have also not understood (this includes some relatives) why people criticize others who live in style or with some sophistication. Cannot only. Why? No need, they'll say. What does one earn money for after all? To have the lifestyle that you aspired to have na? So why not go ahead and live the life you want? OK that is another post]

We have a tendency to collect antique and artistic furniture and we have only about 3000 books. Some of the books are at least a couple of centuries old, that my mom has managed to maintain inspite of all our moving about. And I keep adding to the collection. Some people also don't know how much space some 50 pairs of shoes need ;) Plus my baking obsession .. oh actually my list is very long. We need a room for the library/study, thank-you-very-much. I guess the concept of having a den/study is lost on a lot of people.

Somehow mom and I, because of the kinda family we hailed from and from the heydays, we unfortunately cannot shake off, the, well, a certain class or style in the way we have basically inherited. Unfortunately Chennai and a lot of its landlords don't understand that.

Why don't we own a place yet? We dont. That's all. And a lot of investment gurus told us that it is a total waste of money to invest in a place in Chennai for the kinda space/locality that we might be happy in and we were advised to rent only and told to invest differently.

Yes I know some really nice people who leased their houses to some terrible tenants and are petrified with the experience that they might as well have the place under lock and key than rent it. 

So right now, story of our lives is to find a nice place so that I am not reminded every week by landlord on the importance of converting to save his ancestors who have attained heaven, from the sin of having a Hindu Daughter in law. I have only tried to tell the family No a few times. 

After reading this post, usual stalker will now send me a mail, as he usually does, Marry Me Chinmayi. I will protect you from all these people. Ppppah. I tell you. How all people will say "Oru Kalyanam pannikko, ellam seri aagidum" Like they say, from frying pan to blazing fire ;)

Watch this space. I might actually add some more bizarre questions that we are asked ;)