Wednesday, February 19, 2014

Of being still...

I remember the time I was bullied terribly in school. Sometime in my 4th and 5th standard. There was a constant fear for some people. That point in time finds a list of worst times in my personal history. 

Have you been discriminated against vis-à-vis other siblings? If yes, did you get over it and how?

If you were bullied in school, did you ever come across the bully later and if yes, how did you deal with them? (as for my accounts of bullying I made peace with it, because as an adult, we understand a lot of things in retrospect and I can figure out why some kids were so aggressive)

And finally, are children by nature selfless or selfish? Are concepts of empathy inborn or taught in some children? Why do some children seem kinder than others? 

On a random tangent, I was stuck at a traffic signal today because the free-left was being blocked by motorists ahead of me and I noticed two men right behind me shouting for blocking the road. I yelled back to see if he could understand I wasn't the one who made the mistake…. Somehow I was wondering right after, why was I looking for some sort of a reassurance from a random jack on the road, who was anyway in no position to listen? Could I have been silent instead? 

Many a time do I wish I realised the fine art of detachment from the emotion that results from actions, both by oneself and by others. People will be manipulative but one has to choose to tell the truth anyway. People will be dishonest but one has to choose to trust anyway. And people may be mean but one has to choose kindness anyway. People may wrong us but one has to choose to do the right thing anyway.

A friend said, be still. Be silent. Maybe we can be glad that we didn't sully our thoughts and our tongue by saying things we did not mean. To not react to dishonesty that plays out right in front of us. To not react to unkindness or any sort of a situation that we may deem unpleasant. Easier said than done, to not react to an accusation. I can say that and still react the next moment if something irritates me.

But for now, maybe the answer is in being still. Being silent. 

2 comments:

Sreekanthan Ganesan said...

Yep, easier said than done :)

Have to just be in present, don't have to think much I guess!

And sometimes, I gotta admit it does feel good to give it back to someone who hurts you. In my case, well it puts that old thought to rest and I can move on.

Yashasvi Arunkumar said...

I wouldn't agree with that.
As a school going student, I feel really angry when auto drivers don't know which side of the road they should go in and swerve dangerously close to my cycle.

I learnt that its best not to call out to them as its pointless and completely embarrassing and it certainly didn't help me reach school in time.

But, I think that sometimes we should tell them as it not only makes us more responsible drivers but also others on the road.