Sunday, February 13, 2011

Untitled - 9

So much to ask mom now but work has swallowed a lot of time in the past couple of days. And when I think I ll go ask mom to continue, its too late in the night and she is fast asleep.
Most of my childhood went in my mother teaching me for hours together. Time would fly by apparently until my paatti used to intervene with major drama and say its time to give me some food. 5 hours. 6 hours. Sometimes 8 hours, I have heard my mother would have teach me non stop. 

But very early childhood was a different story. I hear I used to start wailing and bawling as soon as my mother took the Tanpura in her hands to start singing. Maybe I felt insecure about another object taking space in her lap.

Patience was never something I saw when Amma taught me. I had to repeat what she sang, the next instant. Or she would say if you can't repeat after having told you once, you are a rank idiot. I have heard of a lot of anecdotes of the Guru egging the student on with caustic remarks so that they perform better. And be acutely attentive. Somehow she seemed to have copious amounts of patience for other children. She was too kind and patient, I always thought which she never exhibited in me. I also fought with her once for the 'partiality' that she showed to others over me on that. To this day, I believe that some of the students that learned under her during that Gurukula project learned far more than I did in the lifetime I have spent with her. 

Talking of early childhood in Mumbai, I was a kid that only spoke Marathi. Mom went to work. I was in the care of paatti. And during this time she made sure I became a right-hander from a left-hander. She taught me to write அ ஆ and all of that on a slate with a balpam. She took me to school and played with me with my "choppu set" of making tea and coffee and food and everything. To this day I wonder how we managed to communicate. With me bantering in Marathi, she could speak no language but Tamil. How did I ask her what I wanted? How did she know? Even my prayers used to be in Marathi as my "Ajji" who took care of me in Day-care whenever paatti had to be in Madras had taught me a Lakshmi prayer in Marathi. Gharaath Kida Pida Bahar Jao... ____ chi Lakshmi Gharaath aeo. I forget what-chi Lakshmi it was. That used to be the concluding line.

School in Bombay was interesting and to my teachers I was a 'problem child'. A problem because I finished entire text books in one day. English in one day. And every other book and say "Finish". I  once got slapped for it and came home with a swollen cheek. Mother went and politely enquired what the issue was. The teacher was barely 20. She didn't know how to deal with a child who completed an entire year's work in one day. My mother then convinced the teacher to get me new books and send her the bill. I guess this 'disease' continued for quite a while. I still remember doing that with my workbooks years later so that I could sit smugly through class. The only thing that terrorized me was mathematics. It haunted me until my 10th grade. Somewhere some concept was not explained well and everything went downhill from there. I never knew what the problem was. A straight 100 report card until the 6th standard saw a downward arrow in mathematics alone. It was a miracle I passed my 10th math board exams. Thank God. I kicked the subject then.  Pythagoras was my nemesis. I loved algebra and everything else but I hated the concept of proving that a triangle is a triangle. And not anything else. Sigh. I played around with the idea of taking up medicine but they said medicine meant I had to top in mathematics. Figured I'd reach the hangman's noose than the stethoscope and let go of a wish to be a doctor. I could still be a healer. But there is still time for that.

Silently have I watched this lady I call my Mom/Padmhasini/Amma. Silently have I watched the people that she worked with, the people who felt insecure, the parents of other kids, trauma and grief many a times and her swallowing and bearing quite a bit to bring me to where I am today. When I met my paati a couple of years ago and my chinna paatti a few days ago, they had pretty much the same things to say about amma. "Romba Narayya pattuta" (She has suffered a lot). From the family, from others. From more or less a lot of people. And because she remained and remains the same firebrand she is a lot of my colleagues couldn't take it either. Forthright and no bullshit defines her. And if there are people who had issues with that, I figured there was something shady in the first place. Those shades came to light pretty soon.

Several times when Vairamuthu sir met us at events he almost always introduced my mother saying "Ivanga Deivam.. " and pointing to me he would say "Ivanga Deivam thandha poo".

To be continued....


14 comments:

Kalyan said...

Vairamuthu is indeed correct. There is no denying that.

Ravi's Thoughts said...

:) Your brain isn't wired for certain types of math, but is perfectly wired for the rest. It is usually a big puzzle for someone when they could do some (or many) tasks very efficiently and learn new stuff, but find certain types of tasks very easy. You are gifted.

Your blogs are very interesting.. keep them coming..

Shvetha said...

Nice...There is so much here that I can relate to! Especially Maths :) Waiting to read the rest..

My share of life said...

Its just getting better and better :) Loved Vairamuthu sir's intro. I am also noticing the transition from "Mom" to "Amma" :)

Chitra Devi Nagayah said...

Sweet you recount your memories of childhood. Things that were hard to bear are sweet to remember.

Avinash said...

Nice one to read on the start of the day.
Hats off to your mom

Saravana said...

As someone said above, this is really getting more interesting and inspiring.

Liked your 'my experiment with maths' :-).

Waiting for more....

deepak subramanian said...

hats off to your mom..were u a leftie changed into a right hander..i was one too..i used to regret that decision of my parents coz my handwriting was always poor..how was ur handwriting..

Palanu said...

Nice mam..

Akila said...

I remember reading your interview in Hindu Metro plus issue few years back and you said that mathematics was your demon. When I read that I smiled as I had the same trouble with that subject. Could not able to tell you this on that day...'Chinmayi me too,me too'. Fist bump. Yay!
Have a great day.

R-ambam said...

Lovely !

Jayamurugan said...

Reading the posts about your mother inspires me. It also rekindle my interest in learning music. I really love to learn music after hearing that how your mother teaches music during Sundays to students. Dont know if it is possible now to learn music from your mother, but really wish to.

All the best for your career and Wish good health for your mother.

Sumal said...

Hi Chinmayi,

I am a great fan of you. Just love your voice so much that I can easily identify your voice whenever a new song of yours comes... You r an inspiration to me...Recently loved the song from Kullanari kottam... Vizhigalile.... lovely..

Loved your blog... specially the part where vairamuthu sir referred you and your mother "Several times when Vairamuthu sir met us at events he almost always introduced my mother saying "Ivanga Deivam.. " and pointing to me he would say "Ivanga Deivam thandha poo"."

Which is very true..

My hearty wishes to you for all your future milestones.....

Mathangi.S said...

Aha! Lovely write up yet again. :) :)
Just like your write paatti, it was my paatti who had transformed my cousin bro to a right hander from a left hander. Sensed a feeling of Deja vu wen you mentioned tat. :)
And you finishing text books in one day is intriguing! Gethu ka neenga!
and Vairumuthu sir said just the right thing. Love you. :)