Tuesday, December 20, 2005


One of the things that kept me busy through August and September were the preparations for the All India Radio competitions. And I have won the Silver Medal.

I wished I would get a repeat for the All India First for Ghazals 5 years back. But that was not to be. That was the time when they refused to believe that I was a South Indian as I had nil accent to betray that I was.

One was that my throat was sooooo wound up that I couldnt sing anything decent on the day of the final competitions. And I was dead sure that I would not make it. But I have. But I guess its human nature to want more. The Universe and the green-eye conspired against me that day, and maybe the Universe decided to throw in a piece just for some happiness.

This automatically makes me a graded artiste with the AIR, with a B-grade, which I found was strange that they awarded B grade to both first and second prize winners. Anyway henceforth, all that I have to do is work my way through to the A-top grade.

And all this while I was vehement that I wouldnt learn under anyone but Mom, either until I got some sort of recognition like this from a governing body or something to that effect, or give my first 'legal' Hindustani Classical Concert. And thankfuly this has come through.

This was also to emphasized that I have learnt from Mom alone, a lot of people around me didnt know that I learnt my Hindustani Classical from her. Or refused to believe. Mom also was for the doctrine of having a 'stamp' of a popular and well known musician, and also tried unsuccessfully, desperately to put me under gurus outside of her for better experience. I could never sustain any where, more than four classes, with due reverence to all of them. After three futile attempts, she gave up. Because as far as I am concerned mom is the best and whatever I am, and whatever I have learnt in music is from her. She picked up this piece of rock, gave it shape, chiseled it, gave color and breathed life in it. Giving it the power to breathe its own wisps into music.

And, yes its all true that children take advantage of their parents when they are the Guru. And has been the case with me.

Also if I did get these recognitions after I went to another Guru, then all the years of toil, all the work mom had put in would just be passed on, just because he/she is more famous. Again with all due respect to them. But I was not willing to let mom's work go without any credit like that. And So I will continue.....

To do whatever is in my power to get ahead and be a success with music for there can be no better reward to my mom who allowed herself to melt as a candle for me to shine bright. She put her career away, to see me grow, and bring me to what I am today.

And this time round the Universe better conspire against anything else that even thinks to deter me and work with me :) Like they say, If you want something so bad, then the whole Universe works for you to make it a reality.. so time to get to work Universe.. :)


B said...

Very nice post.

I can only summarize this by saying that you are the daughter that your mom deserves.

Continue to stay close to yourself in times to come.

Good luck.

venky said...

I am sure your Amma is VERY proud of you! Please continue your fabulous work and may success always be yours...

With best wishes,

My days(Gops) said...

Congrats and best of luck

Anonymous said...

Your post is really touching - you show your mother the greatest respect by considering her your foremost Guru.

Arvind Srinivasan said...

Wow cool :-) Congratulations - finally something to accredit the hard work huhh ? :)

Usha said...

hi, this is one of the most touching posts I have read in the blogsphere. This not only shows your love for your mom but also the level of confidence you have in yourself and your mom to get ahead in your field purely by virtue of your merits rather than piggybacking on the name and fame of a celebrity guru.
I admire your spirit and oh yes, I love your songs.