Untitled - 8

By the time my mother was 14 she had listened to 3 of Flute Mali's concerts of which 2 were accompanied on the Violin by Dwaram Mangathayaru and one was accompanied by Mrs T Rukmini. Mom took a great fancy for Dwaram Mangathayaru and wanted to learn music from her. They were living in the same locality, i.e Triplicane, separated by two streets. (Dwaram Mangathayaru still lives in the same Dwaram house on Bandala Venugopala Naidu street. Mom took me to meet her a couple of years ago once again. She also happened to be my first Guru other than my mother. I remember at probably 8-9 years of age, I took a baby violin and went to learn from her. Didn't last long :))

There was stiff opposition in the house for taking up music as a profession. What would one expect anyway, with the kind of varied offices that the elder men in the house held? My mother was supported by her elder sister who volunteered to foot the bill for the music classes. After quite a lot of commotion the determination of my mother made thatha take her to Dwaram Mangathayaru. What impressed Mangthayaramma my mother did not know (maybe I should go and ask her, but the old timers that they are I wonder if I will wheedle any information from her at all!), but then on, Mangathayaru became my thatha's adopted daughter at the very first instance. The question of footing a bill did not arise as Mangathayaramma refused to accept any fee. It was the perfect Gurukula system. But thatha, from then on, made a habit of buying silk saris and jewelry in sets of three most of the time. One set went to my mother's elder sister. One went to mom. The other went to Mangathayaramma - the third daughter. This went on and a couple of years later, Mangathayaramma got a job in Tirupati and later in Vijayawada and had to move from Chennai. Thus the curtains fell on regular classes with Mangathayaramma. Mom refused to go to any other Guru. I have taken after her as I see. However, whenever Mangathayaramma visited Madras, they met, the connections were intact and occasionally classes did happen. Finally, Mangathayaramma personally took my mother to Carnatic Music College for admission.

The application was given for a Pre-Vidwan course. The then Principal Sri T N Krishnan and the other judges Sri K V Narayanaswamy, Kalpakam Swaminathan, after listening to mom, (guess that was a practice for the entrance examination), took her directly into the Sangeeta Vidwan course of the Carnatic Music College.

Two years flew by. She learned under stalwarts like K V Narayanaswamy, B Rajam Iyer, R Vedavalli, B Krishnamoorthy, Tiruppamburam Shanmukhasundaram.... While most others did not pay heed to the classes of Sri Shanmukhasundaram, my mother's alert ears did not fail to notice the difference in his music and the typical nuances of the Nagaswaram. He, being an alumnus of the same college, trained under Brindamma and Muktamma, showed remarkable tinges of their music. This was carefully registered in mom's memories and she sang the compositions taught by him with relish. They were systematic, dexterously constructed in terms of Sangatis, just as the Nagaswaram tradition would have it. With that, the nuances of Brindamma and Muktamma aesthetically sprinkled here and there, she was very careful in taking a lot from him. 

The Dhanamma baani (style) is a classic explanation or embodiment of the real music not being on the notes but anywhere and everywhere in between the notes. (This reminds me of a Bryan Adams quote, where he says music is in between the notes. I am not sure about the theorems and how they go about proving things, but this would probably suffice to say that music is universal)

K V Narayanaswamy would not open his eyes during class. But one student from the 40 and odd group making a mistake, his head will turn, his eyes will open, with a piercing look on the exact person who erred. "Yaar Adhu..!!! Kaezhu (Kaelu)!!" (to be imagined in a low guttaral whisper that can shake the guts out of you). And with a weariness, he would turn his head, close his eyes and resume. 

B Rajam Iyer would make very sarcastic remarks making the class laugh out aloud. 

Sometimes the teachers would say sarcastically "Oh...!! Apdi ellaam kooda irukko.. Anya swaram ellam vardhe?! Pudussa kathukkanum pola irukke.!! " (Mom is laughing now, as she recalls these events and may I say I am louuuuuing this interview process!!)

Having said that, an example that a person learns all the time was Sri K V Narayanaswamy.  Amongst Sri Ariyakudi's disciples, he was the leading. Still, he taught at Carnatic Music College. (Here, I ask Why? Apdidhaan iruppa appo ellam ... cholli kudukkardhu was part of their lives..!!) 

 Mom sang Nambi Kettavarillavo in Ragam Kalyani for her Quarterly Examination. Rajam Iyer was the examiner. Mom sang a sangati in the Anupallavi which was not taught by Sri KVN. Though it was not a deliberate attempt but it had happened perchance. While Sri Rajam Iyer nodded his head in approval, told my mother that would be all for evaluation, Sri KVN was outside the exam room, listening to this keenly. Mom came out of the exam room, Sri KVN was facing the other direction, turned toward her, repeated the sangati she had just sung and said "Nanna irundhudhu".

Thus her Ramnad connection was reestablished at Carnatic Music college.

There was another example to extol the simplicity of Sri KVN and a message that every music aspirant can take. Sri KVN was a top-notch performer of his times. Mom had already commenced research in voice culture and teaching methodologies. (At this point I feel my mother has wasted a good 10 years of her life on me, especially the past 10 years, like she jokingly says often, being my aayah. Regret.)

She happened to take up this subject and one more, to establish that the music is not on the note. She did this as a demonstration in her special musicology classes. As an ancillary, students had the option of taking either an instrument or Advanced Musicology  at Govt Music College. They used to refer to it as "Musicology Special". Mom had chosen AM. Professor V Balakrishnan used to ask my mother to give student enumerations and demonstrations during the classes. In one such demonstration, she spoke about the musical exercises for expanding the range and some of the herbs which would help the same. 

This was keenly watched by KVN, Parur Anantharama Iyer and a couple of Veena lecturers from a distance where they could easily hear and observe what was going on in the lecture hall. As the class got over and the students were coming out, KVN called out to mom 

"Padmasini chettha inga vaa..!" She shivered in fright thinking she had made a gross blunder in her demo. 

"Pinne orukka chollu paappom. Enna chonnayakkum anga..?"

"Ayyo Bayama irukku sir.  Romba olarittaena? Thappa sir?

"Illa nanna irundhudhu.. Chollu paapom? Adhellam ezhudhi kudu..!"

She then sat and wrote down what she had just demonstrated, names of the herbs et al and within a week also went to Parry's corner and procured the herbs for him. The specific exercises he took was for Mandra Saadhana for improving the volume and tonal quality in the lower register. He said the exercises and the herbs did immense help to him. And after his December Music Festival concert, he remembered to call my mother and ask her "How did you find my voice?" like a child or maybe like a patient would ask his doctor, with all innocence. This is an incredible memory. Which is why he was an all time great musician. He learned from anybody. Even if it were his student. (Again, reminded of the interview that I had with Sri K J Yesudas a couple of weeks ago at Kollur Mookambika temple, where he went on to explain that life is a constant learning process. He sang the first few lines of Harivarasanam and went on to explain "Arivimardhanam" should not be sung as one word but should be sung as Ari-Vimardhanam, accenting the Vimardhanam. As the word Arivimardhanam has no meaning if sung as one word. This, he said he had learnt only a few months ago, from a Sanskrit scholar and explaining the importance of being a constant learner)

Similarly when mom was giving a demo on "The note alone is not important, its the movement that matters". She took a Swara Pallavi in Todi that she had learned from Dwaram Mangathayaru as an example and narrated the Ga appearing in various tonal colours and placement. KVN promptly called her, asked her to specifically sing those phrases. "Nee edho Todi 'ga' pathi demonstration kuduthiyaame? Ennadhadhu.. Enakku paadikaami...?"

Swarapallavi is not a musical form familiar in the Tamilian parts. It is an exclusive amaanat of Andhra Desam. This became a solid foundation for my mother thanks to Dwaram Mangathayaru. She learned a number of Swara Pallavi-s from her. (Making a mental note to learn these from mom, duh on this blog) He didn't pay any heed to her protests. "Sir ongalukku edhuraka epdi paadardhu.. bayama irukku". He said "Nanna irundhudhunnu kaelvi pattaen.. paadu" Sri KVN made mom write the Swara Pallavi and thereafter sing it out to him. "Nanna irukkae..!" He said. He had an enthusiasm of collecting such compositions.

Eventhough Sri KVN, hailing from Kerala, was considered the prime disciple of Sri Ariyakudi Ramanuja Iyengar, he had gone to learn from him when KVN was already a performing artiste of repute. Sri Rajam Iyer did Gurukulavaasam under Sri Ariyakudi and therefore he had a lot of narrations about Poochi Iyengar and Ariyakudi, thereby, the Ramnad traditions.

When mom was on a documentation spree, much, much later, when she returned from Bombay, KVN once told her that "Gurukula vaasam panni ore Guru va follow panradhu oru vishayam. Innonnu, pravurthi kaaga praapalyama irukkaravaalta thaedi poi sishyana irukkardhu. Naangallam apdi dhaan" during her interview with him documenting the Guru Sishya Parampara. Not only Sri KVN, but this was repeated by many others, like Sri R K Srikanthan, Smt M L Vasanthakumari., Calcutta K S Krishnamurthi. (Mom had worked on documenting a lot of their work when she had come down from Mumbai. As a child I would accompany her to many of these visits. I still find pictures of me in those pictures taken then. And I hear her steady breathing as she falls asleep)

To be continued....

Untitled - 7 (The Ramnad Connection)

The Raja of Ramnad - these words itself are very special to my mother and my Thatha. Maharaja Shanmukha Raghunatha Sethupathy was the last who had the kingdom and later it was taken away by  the Zamindari Act. He was also a Minister in the Central Govt for some time. Thatha and the Raja were class mates in Presidency college and were cricket-mates. The royal family of Ramnad, have a great culture. Even though they were royal descendants belonging to the Mukkulathor, members of the royal family would address others with respect. Even a child was addressed with respect by them. Addressing anybody by their first names was not in their practice and as a result nicknames were awarded. One of the great violinists, who used to laugh with a peculiar mannerism was called 'Gubeer' Iyer (The Grandfather of Lalgudi G Jayaraman). Thereafter he was always addressed as 'Gubeer'. My Thatha who, during one of the games, fell while attempting to catch the ball. This entire act reportedly resembled a Korali Viddaikaaran of those times. And from then on my thatha got to be known as Korali Iyengar. Thus did everyone get their own nicknames while the royal family maintaining the custom of not calling anyone by their first names. 

Even though they were friends, the Raja always welcomed Thatha as "Vaanga Korali" and my Thatha in turn always addressed him as Maharaja. The royal connection continues till now. Our family doctor is a descendant of this very family. Dr Prasad, nephew of Shankukha Raghunatha Sethupathy,  is affectionately called by his kith and kin as Pressy. His mother, Ganesha Kunjara Naachiar, the sister of Raja Shanmukha Raghunatha Sethupathy and mom were very close. Shri Kashinath Dorai, her brother together used to narrate a lot of stories about music in the royal durbar. They were all descendants of the great Bhaskara Sethupathy, the great patron of Swami Vivekananda who had sponsored the Swami's trip to Chicago to the Parliament of the World's Religions where he rendered his famous speech beginning with these words "Sisters and brothers of America".

The Ramnad samasthanam patronized great musical scholars like Maha Vaidyanatha Iyer, Patnam Subramanya Iyer and Ramnad (Poochi) Srinivasa Iyengar. Sri Kasinath Dorai used to narrate countless anecdotes and stories about their musical plights to mom. Days and days, hours and hours in the huge patio of Ramnad House in Cenotaph Road, (Now the Russian Consulate), became a platform for improving her acumen in musical history and musical techniques of Ramnad lineage. Incidentally Sri Ariyakudi Ramanuja Iyengar is the disciple of Sri Poochi Iyengar; Sri B Rajam Iyer and Sri K V Narayanaswamy were disciples of Sri Ariyakudi and my mother had the opportunity of learning from both Sri B Rajam Iyer and Sri K V Narayanaswamy at the Music College, Madras. In a way, she was destined to follow the Ramnad tradition. Poochi Iyengar was made to learn from both Maha Vaidyanatha Iyer and Patnam Subramanya Iyer. Maha Vaidyanatha Iyer had a forte on the higher octaves of music while Sri Patnam Subramania Iyer was an exponent in Tanam and had exclusive techniques in Tanam. Sri Kasinath Dorai used to reel of demonstrations of Patnam Subramania Iyer's 'Chakra Tanam', 'Manduka' and 'Markata' Tanams. The same Manduka Tanam when narrated and demonstrated by Swami Shantananda Saraswati during a drive from Kuala Lumpur to Johor Bahru in 1998 was a reliving experience to my mother. But Swamiji narrated as the technique being taught to him by a Sangeeta Swami of Kashi while Kasinath Dorai was narrating the technique as was practiced by Patnam Subramania Iyer. Poochi Srinivasa Iyengar was sponsored by the royal court to learn from both Gurus to imbibe all the qualities of both stalwarts. Learning under two Gurus was next to impossibility in those days. But because it was a royal command, both stalwarts taught Poochi Srinivasa Iyengar who also became a Vaggeyakara. (A Vaggeyakara is a Lyricist-composer).

Dr Prasad's mother, Smt Ganesha Kunjara Naachchiyar avgl, Srimaan Kasinath Dorai avgl and my mother used to have several musical sessions, a lot of which I shall hope to strike down here. 

Mom now holds some of the rarest manuscripts of the Royal family that cover the musical lessons of Sri Poochi Iyengar, Raga Indexes so on. Also in my mother's possession is a 100+ year old Tanpura belonging to Ustad Abdul Karim Khan saheb. How it was gifted to my mother is another story. :)

To be continued.....

**Most of the content here is narrated by mom and is reproduced verbatim.

Untitled - 6

Padmhasini was born the youngest of 3 children to Jayalakshmi and Sudarshanacharya Thirumalai Aiengar in Paramakudi and was brought to the then Madras when she was 5 years of age. I have heard the family had establishments in Madras, Ramanathapuram and in Paramakudi for education and business purposes. 

Mr Aiengar had 3 siblings, the eldest Sudarshanacharya Tirupathi Iyengar, next was my thatha, S T Aiengar (I don't know why he had this interesting spelling to his name. Wish I had begun blogging when he was alive), Sundararajan and the youngest Ramaswamy. Jayalakshmi had two siblings, Sriranga and Srinivasan (alias 'Ambi' the famous nickname!). I hear Ambi died when mom was very young. Sriranga paatti is still alive and refuses to smile when a picture is clicked :p

S T Iyengar or Mutha thatha was the Chief Engineer in the Electricity Board of the Madras Province (Madras Province included Andhra Pradesh, Tamilnadu and Orissa. He apparently worked in the Pycara dam project as well). My Thatha, Aiengar was Garrison Engineer in the Army. Sundararajan joined Delhi Secretariat as Under Secretary and went on to retire as Deputy Secretary of Atomic Energy Establishment. He had worked with Homi Bhabha and Vikram Sarabhai. Ramaswamy served as the Government Printer in Aden during the British Rule there. Apparently every time he came home on holidays every 2 years or so, he would ship his car of the moment and the car would arrive before him at Bombay port. And he would drive down from Bombay to Madras in about a day and a half. I wonder how the roads were then that he could manage to do that!

Now the family had memberships at Brahma Gana Sabha, and Narada Gana Sabha considered the leading Sabhas of those times. They rented out the premises of Music Academy to stage their programmes. Also another reputed Sabha of those times was the Parthasarathy Swami Sabha. It had its own locus standi unaffected by any competition. The family had donor memebership in all these sabhas. The family was more interested in watching dramas and the performances of popular musicians. These concerts and drama visits also was a social exercise where everyone flaunted their latest jewelry or Saris. Mom was famous for her Venkatagiri saris. Talking of these sari I hear they costed between 13 rupees and 200 rupees. Apparently the 200/- sari had zari all over. Hmm :) I hear Venkatagiri had an exclusive position among cotton saris. 

Balakrishna Sastrigal, the great Harikatha exponent was the first major influence on my mother taking to music. Her taste in Carnatic music was in people like Smt D K Pattammal, Sri M D Ramanathan, Brindamma, Muktamma and the like, where there was erudite scholarship and sedate musical flow. While this was going on her attention was drawn toward Hindustani classical music thanks to a certain "Jaggu Mama" (Mr Seshadri) who were occupants of the first floor in the same house my mother's family lived. He was a great connoisseur of Hindustani music and he used to take my mother to all the Hindustani classical music concerts of Chennai. His wife, Mrs Jayalakshmi Seshadri was a Veena exponent, one of the prime disciples of Kalpakam Swaminathan. Since Mrs Jayalakshmi wasn't too interested in Hindustani classical music, Jaggu Mama took along this teenaged girl to all these concerts. He first introduced and educated my mother about the nuances and intricacies of Hindustani music, making her listen to various LP Records of concerts. 

We still maintain a lot of these LP Records even today.

T S Balakrishna Sastrigal was a stalwart of Harikatha Kalakshepam. Harikatha Kalakshepam as such required mono-acting skills, and Sri Sastrigal was a matchless genius. His assistant on stage used to sing brilliant music. Harikatha Kalakshepam in those days always had a very good singer, supporting the Harikatha exponent. In Shastriji's case, he had a fantastic musician supporting him (Will get back to you with the name) and the amazing sangatis he used to reel out in Tyagaraja Kritis or the amazing delineation of ragas he used to hum in the background while Sastrigal narrated some of the sequences was to have been experienced live to know how the  "Background score" was interwoven in a live Harikatha performance. It was like cinema on stage. Sastrigal used to cry. He used to laugh. You could see a woman in him. You could see a child in him. Sometimes he would be the father. You could literally see Dasharatha on stage. You didnt need to imagine what Dasharatha would have been like in front of Kaikeyi begging for mercy for Raghava (Rama). With music, tears, emotive dialogues and finally how Dasaratha fainted was enacted by him. It was something that was etched deep in my mother's memory. He was a genius. And a genius of those times has no parallel in present day existence. Life then, offered the leisure, peace to gradually take in and assimilate to be permanently stored in the subconscious mind. 

Taking to Hindustani classical music of course was the contribution of Jaggu mama (aka Seshadri)

And thus were the first seeds for a life long aspiration to music sown.

To be continued....

**A lot of the content here is narrated by mom and is reproduced verbatim. 

Untitled - 5

What explains this verbose wave? The loss of voice and a viral fever. Being given no better option than to be silent. I don't want to hear myself croak and bleat really.

Only when we are forced to silence and not preoccupied with our own constant chatter do we find other forms of expression. Maybe meaningful. Maybe not.

People who have called the past couple of days ask "Am I speaking to Chinmayi?" "My God!!!" first stunned without a word to say at the voice they hear on their receivers that sounds like a cross between a frog and a donkey and the occasional sheep or a goat. While I am having fun with their varied reactions, words spill in this space.

Untitled - 4

I seem to be on a roll. And I am letting myself be. May the words spill as long as they intend to as right now they seem to have a destiny of their own to make it to this space. Only they found the instrument through my fingers and this keyboard. And yes a million other tech things which I really needn't strike down. 

I have heard a lot of people say why it might not work if your Guru is your parent. I am not sure about other relationships but the most I have heard is that when your mother or a father is your Guru, they say you tend to things easy and maybe take them for granted. I wonder where this notion stemmed from, as most most of the musicians in India have been belonged to a dynasty of musicians. And then there were those whose progeny decided not to take it up and decided not to go through with the rigors of it. I wonder what such Gurus feel. Frustrated? Tired? Sad? that their progeny refuse to take their legacy forward? I would never really know. And I hope, that I don't get to know by first-hand experience. 

For a lot of things, I am thankful that my Guru is my mother. Though I say so myself, I am yet to come across a teacher more sincere than amma. But then how would you know, you may ask, when you haven't learned from anyone else. The thing is, I have. I have tried learning an instrument from another Guru. And the number of phone calls and visits I need to make to another city for a few hours of class is quite something. And that is how my mother learned. The really hard way. Waiting through the day the teacher might probably give a direct class of less than an hour. And through the day, being with the Guru and being in the presence others who learned from the Guru, the concentration was heightened. The urge and the craving to hang on to every note, every word that was spoken and exchanged and played and sung made sure that the individual at the music class was not merely a student. But an aspirant. Someone who had to aspire all day long, day after day, month after month. And in these several days did the sishyas hear the words of wisdom, musical exchanges between their Guru and other Gurus and stalwarts in the field. A veritable Satsang. Something that is absolutely missing today. And something that I am rarely a part of at Rahman sir's studio. When some of the greatest filmmakers, poets and creators converge in a certain space, every word that they have said and the experience thereof reminded me of my mothers words when she spoke about the Satsangs with her Gurus. Mom was a student of Tamilnadu Govt Music College during the time when it was a place of great learning and doyens of Carnatic classical music were teachers. Thus was my mother exposed to a variety of schools, learned personally under various masters. And not surprisingly identified as an intellectual and lauded for her brain. 

Meeting some of the masters later, as I did, I heard them speak of my mother during her younger days and her razor sharp thinking and the injustice she had to later see in various spheres, I couldn't but help admire this lady who just happened to be my mother and Guru.

To you this might be the third post speaking of my mother. But to me this speaks of this individual, Mrs T Padmhasini who is the most profound influence in my life and to a few others.

I know how my mother looked and searched for students that she could teach and owing to my winning a couple of competitions and other parents asking me who I had learned from, it automatically brought some students to my mother. And after Kannathil Muthamittal, some more. But the goals were strange The goals was not to learn music or become a professional singer of merit or a scholar. But to learn music now, sing for A R Rahman six months later, buy a car a year after that and then build a house. So many years of my becoming a professional, we are yet to build ours :)

And strangely some students were pulled out because their parents did not like the idea of their kids idolizing someone other than them. Weird I thought. But that was the way things were. 

Finally my mother gave up on wanting to teach. Even to be a successful teacher, you need to have a certain street-smartness or have to be plain darn lucky. Padmhasini may be a strong, forthright, intuitive lady but street-smart she was not. And luck is famous for having failed her many a times. 

Speaking about my mother and her tryst with musicians in the classical music industry to a filmmaker who gaped for the most part while listening to what I had to say and said he needs to meet my mother. And maybe make a film or two. Twists and turns and several knots have there been in her story.

A lot of the musicians in the Carnatic music field today have been silent observers and still know Chinmayi as the daughter of Padmhasini. If there was someone who has been hounded for most part of a life it would be this lady I know personally and have lived with.

To be continued.

And the picture with Thalaivar

January 3 2011

Le Royal Meridien

Book release of Sri Vairamuthu's 1000 Padalgal

Unaroo - Traffic

Untitled - 3

One of the biggest differences I think between living in Mumbai and Chennai was how they perceived a single woman. With a daughter. As far as I remember, even though I left Mumbai very early, life was easier. Less complicated. People did not judge you every single moment. Because, simply, they were too busy leading their own lives to bother about yours or judge how you should live.

Somehow in 'conservative' Chennai, it became the purview of every member in the society to teach someone else how to live. Especially the single woman. What is the best way to lead a life. What is the best way to do things. And not quite amazingly, each one had a rank different decision. And from there came these random people advising my mother, on how it is 'wrong' to put me in music. Not normally wrong. But morally, virtuously wrong to make a career in music for a 'daughter'. This was in the 1990-s. Which is why I used to joke that it was a crime to be a single woman and easier to be a widow in Chennai, or at that time, I guess I used to say India. (Now don't come back and criticize me for this line). If I had been a son, there would have been no such perceptions. FYI. But on the flip-side I know a lot of parents telling us they are unable to take such 'bold' decisions because their families forbid them to or in the fear of being scandalized by their own kith and kin. So glad that I wasn't 'blessed' with such a family. I have been blissfully away from most of them.

Well meaning advice alright, but this would be from people who had a certain view in life, myopic in some cases, or those who refuse to see a horizon perhaps because the vastness might frighten them. I know not what the reason would be. But then, I will have to also say, that the society then was not kind on innovators, who they loved to call 'rebels' then. You had to do Engineering or Medicine. Nothing else would do. Sad to say that still exists in various parts of India as the right thing to do.

A Senior Fellow with the Govt. of India, Dept of Culture, my mother decided to pull me out of school after 8th standard to train me more rigorously in music and make a true scholar of me.  (Thankfully my grandfather was well ahead of his times too. Toooo ahead for the 1940-s. But seemed more in line with the 90-s. It was imperative for my mother to ask his permission before anything. Even when he was 93. Yep. The people in my family lived closer to 100. All of them. Thatha would give mom a  go-ahead for all her plans).  At that time I remember it was impossible to explain "Documentary Film Maker" or Research and Documentation in music. I know of musicians in the Carnatic field who did not know the difference between Archives and Archaeology. This was when my mother was documenting a musician and his life. My the end of that documentary we got a crash course on the musicians in orthodox, conventional god-fearing Carnatic music field. And the main reason why I refuse to sing Carnatic music today. And in the same breath, let me also tell you, that the Film Industry has perhaps more honest and straightforward people than anywhere else, IMHO. Which includes the Carnatic Classical Music field.

Veering from the topic a bit, my mother was also my first lesson on Why NOT to share your ideas with anyone. Especially in project proposals. She would write innumerable proposals applying for  grants. And from just the synopsis in the proposal, others would poach the idea, with their own limited understanding, pull a few strings and get a grant. A lot of such things happened back then. A dedicated team worked to see what Padmhasini had presented :) Mom took quite a while to find out and as she saw similar projects with the same content as she had presented being worked on by other 'scholars' she saw what was happening and stopped writing to any of these foundations that primarily funded documentation projects in music. And thus did some 'pioneers' come into being.

She had devised a truly amazing syllabus and had even spoken to teachers for various classes.  Traveled to Delhi several times to see if there was an education system that could aid kids like me. Or a certification for that matter that could take me back to mainstream collegiate education if I wanted to. But no one really knew. And Google was not rampant then. No one knew about the National Open School system then. To people like me and those in sports, it was a total boon. I remember the principal of NOS telling me that a lot of classical musician's kids in Delhi studied through this system. Because really, no conventional school had the concept of identifying a talent other than the numbers on the report card. Be it sports or music. Hindu Senior Secondary, in Indira Nagar, and my principal then, Mr Venkatachalam was a class apart. He was a visionary. I remember him allowing a classmate to come late to school every day, because the boy's father had taken VRS and had taken it upon himself to train him in tennis seriously. His special coaching got over only at 11 AM and he would come to school around 11:30 or something. Every single day. I hear he is doing well. And that his brother is a professional player. Forget the names now. 

After seeing the pressure of 10th std and what I went through, we saw there was no option of kicking Mathematics in the CBSE syllabus. And if I continued school the only option would be to battle mathematics and forget music until I finished 12th boards. Which was not an option at all. Thankfully we discovered NOS and during the time between my 15-17th year I finished studying German at Max Mueller Bhavan, had begun French, some courses in E Commerce and Designing from SSI and NIIT, worked at Carnaticmusic.com for more than a year (loved this experience as I knew how the corporate world functioned and kept in touch with Carnatic music, which I was otherwise losing touch with as I had shifted to Hindustani classical music), dabbled a while at Student Concepts (they had some project they wanted to work with schools, I forget what exactly now. Manoj, who started SC, was a dreamer ahead of the school educational standards and standardized thinking then) won the All India Radio competitions for Ghazal and Hindustani classical music and rigorously practiced Odissi and learned to play the Tabla. I did some freelance German translation shortly thereafter, for the fun of it and to stay in touch with the language. Blue Elephant was unofficially born a year or so later and officially maybe 3-4 years after this. Given a choice, I would have a pulled out of school earlier. To someone like me, conventional school is a waste of time. The West has woken up to home schooling years ago. Those who dare do it. I am not sure whether India would wake up to it or not, but if my progeny happen to show any brilliant musical inclination, I don't think they will be in a conventional school for too long.

When my mother stepped into Chennai, I think one of her first projects was this Audio Glossary she did for Aurobindo Ashram. Again something she did free of charge, because she was of this notion that a spiritual organization should not be given a bill. She was too good for her own good. 

I remember being a part of all the sessions, her recordings with all the front ranking classical musicians today, directing them, the voice-over sessions with P C Ramakrishna. I wish now, if I can have a time machine and go back to record her working. Sigh. She was a fire brand. And people didn't move a muscle. It was hard to get people to work. Ask some engineers/technicians anything at that time, they will say "Its not possible". It frustrated my mom to no end.  I now hear some music directors of today complaining of the same thing. Whenever a composer wanted to innovate they would get "Its not possible". I would not like to state who, because I do not have the permission to publish that here.  

Whereas in Mumbai they were highly open to ideas. Before the time of music videos, I remember mom discussing the concept of shooting videos for music. And the idea was immediately dumbed down. "Who the hell would watch a music and a video?". And just a couple of years later music videos started, peaked and plateaued. 

The audio glossary mom worked on was released by Times Music as Aalaap. There was another thing here. By the time Aalaap released, which took a really long time between the production in 1990-1991 to its release in 1999, the content she wrote for the glossary was poached by another musician. Who made quite a fast buck even before Times Music or Aurobindo Society could realize what was happening. Somehow the same musicians that worked with mom in the project told her of the duplication. But considering India and Intellectual Property, nothing could be done. And anyway it was the purview of Aurobindo Society. Now however, my mother's work has expanded and swelled manifold, which I intend to bring to publication. May God guide us and bring this plan to fruition. She keeps saying she has so much to give and so much to do. She gave it all up because I had stepped in and become a professional. 

I still remember Sri Vishwa, telling me when I was probably 12 or 13 "You should be very glad that your mother has not pushed you into this prodigy-sagadhi. You won't understand why I am calling this entire thing a sagadhi now but you will, later". I had sung for him then. My mother did take me to a few doyens, ask me to sing and get their opinion. Whatever I heard the doyens telling my mother was one of the reasons I stuck to my guns of not going to a popular Guru. Why should anyone else get the credit for my mother's hard work and sacrifice? A year or so after my meeting him, Sri Vishwa passed on. But what he said rings true to this day. The word prodigy is used even more freely today. On everyone and anyone. Mostly on those who don't deserve that tag. Not only from him, but from several other stalwarts have I known that a prodigy must be safeguarded and carefully groomed for several years before put on stage. Not be on display from channel to channel, stage to stage and show to show.

So many of the doyens my mother knew and has worked with have passed on. Mrs Sulochana Pattabhiraman, Sri K S Krishnamurthi, Sri Vishwa, Smt D K Pattamma (who always saw a daughter in mother. I still remember mom saying I was taken to meet her when I was but a few days old). Somewhere down the line, from being known as Chinmayi, Daughter of Padmhasini, Padmhasini came to be known as the mother of Chinmayi. And now its perhaps time to bring my mother out from her professional sabbatical.

Untitled - 2

One of the stronger memories of my early teens was my mother's Gurukula project. She wanted to reinvent the Gurukula project for the modern times. Its common knowledge that my mother has been my only Guru though she tried a million times to send me to other Gurus for the ISI mark of going to a 'popular' Guru. One class or two I would be back and refuse to go. 

My mom taught a few students during that time. And refused to take fees because she believed that Vidya was for daanam. I know now that giving something for free is not given much respect. Even though a lot of the students come back today and say that they have never been able to learn from anyone else after that.

The Gurukula-styled classes with my mother's students, perhaps 10 of them or perhaps less, landed up at home on Sundays at 6 or maybe 7 AM in the morning. Starting with prayers, pranayama and meditation there was a short recess for breakfast, which mom used to make. I really cannot remember now, what she gave us all. Should ask her. But its better she blog about it herself. Hopefully that will come soon. Thereafter rigorous vocal exercises began until lunch. Lunch would be something exciting soups and main course. It would be a different menu each week. A lot of times, my mom would get us to practice the vocal exercises the 'n' number of times and go into the kitchen once in a while to cook. She always cooked personally because the entire process of cooking the food for all of us was accompanied by chanting of various mantras the process. 

Sometimes we used to peek into the kitchen to know what was cooking. The aromas would be highly distracting.

Mom was a pretty cool teacher. The post lunch session went in explanation of various concepts. Usually triggered by a question. She would ask one of us to ask her something and from there discussions would begin. And during this time all of us could lean back, stretch our legs, even lie down if we wanted to, while listening to her. And no, I don't remember any of us falling asleep. After this began another round of learning compositions, writing notations until tea-time where another round of snacks came through. After some more classes post tea, the Sunday class would come to an end at 6PM. Today, it is a great fad to say food is 'energized' or 'energizing' anything at all is an amazing thing to do. But this has been a part of our culture and living for aeons. I guess, we should have 'packaged' all this way better as is expected these days.

During that time, a lot of the students said they did better in school. Attention spans had become better. Performance was better. But as one student after another hit 10th std, music clearly took a back seat for every student, except me of course.

Guess only my mother had the guts to put me through music. In other cases, the families did not accept. Some uncle, aunt, grandmother or grandfather, brother or sister disapproved with a child in the family taking music seriously. Or maybe, it was a matter of destiny. Or like the famous quote said, "I was fine but education ruined me" and to just tinker with it a bit, "They were fine, but board exams ruined their plans". hehe. 

I somehow remember that my mother was an epitome of patience, taught the other students more concepts, taught them more than I ever had. And no I am not joking. My mother was very impatient with me if I didn't repeat a musical line the next instant. But she was painfully patient with the others. And every time she would say "Illa Kanna" "Illa ma" to explain. If she did lose her cool then one can be sure they had messed up big time with their singing.

And I also remember it was during one of these classes that I got the call to go and record at Rahman sir's studio for Kannathil Muthamittal. No one except my mother knew for the entire period between the recording of the song and its release, that I had met Rahman sir or that I had sung this song. 

My mother's experiment had come to an end by the time Kannathil Muthamittaal released. And thence began my career as a professional playback singer.

Latest in

"Unaru" in the film Traffic my Sri Samson Kottor. A solo in Malayalam after a very long time. This song moved me while I was singing it. And its lovely to hear today from Twitter that Traffic is a major hit. Always good when producers make their money. I wish they always do, but that would be in a perfect world.

A duet with Ranjith after quite a long time in the movie Guns composed by Ronnie Raphael. I love this song. "Thaaja Thaaja Kanasugalu". I quite like the way my voice has been mixed.

And another duet with Vijay Yesudas in Muthukku Muthaaga composed by Kavi Periya Thambi. "Enna Panni Tholachcha"

Realized they all released this week. Tamil Kannada and Malayalam. Quite like this :)

Untitled - 1

Days and days go by. Many a times I begin a blog. Then leave it after 3 lines. Maybe I should make a blog of all the unfinished ones. The things I thought I wanted to say. And saw words stopped mid-way. Words refused to travel the distance from my mind, through my fingers, through the keyboard, to this space. But today, I

Happened to meet my extended family after ages today and met my grandmom's younger sister. There were so many similarities and so many differences. Sitting there and observing all the myriad faces, words, attitudes, expressions its amazing how families stay together. Amazing how families decide to be together through thick and thin, tough times and happy ones. And amazing again how families decide NOT to be together. My grandmom would be quite a sport, learn a smattering of English. Proudly announce the word "Chemistry" and say "Naan Ingleeesh Katthunduttaen di!!" She figured out a way to remember images of English words and every time she looked at the cover of my text books she would say Chemistry or Biology. Ammamma was a lady, that dropped out of school at 10. Got married to my Thatha, a man who served in the Indian Army then, went to jail during the freedom movement, produced a film too, I hear though I wonder what came of it, started a printing press and did a lot of million other things, spoke immaculate English and had a bearing that I hardly find in men of today. For that matter, I found the same bearing in Mr Pattabhiraman, the late Sulochana ji's husband. In a Mr. Padmanabhan, whose son is a journalist of repute. The bearing which I rarely see in men today. Maybe it belonged to the men of that era alone. And didn't pass down with the family heirlooms.

Meeting the younger Ammamma today brought back a lot of memories. She just refused to smile at the camera. But she was amazed to see the picture as soon as it was taken on the phone. "Photo eduthuthtta dee. Gettikkaari!!" Couldn't help laughing. If only she knew the gettikaarathanam of kids wielding IPads today. She had her trademark exclamation. And blessed me with words I usually hear from people her age. And gave me very sound advice. Advice on men which is so in tune with today's 2011. In the few hours that flew, so many memories, so many words exchanged, some remained unsaid, but felt. Holding hands with the lady who is almost 90, a hold that seemed so similar to my own Ammamma's hands, but yet different. A hold that conveys a lot more than words ever could. And maybe it is not supposed to convey anything at all. Its something that is left open to interpretation. Like a blank paper - a paper that allows only beautiful things to be written on it.

A lot of times I wonder how the school-uneducated Jayam had a successful marriage of 80 years with my Thatha. How several different people could live together in a joint-family set up then. But then, I guess people just decided to do the things they did and be with the people they wanted to.

Choices that many refuse to take today. Decisions many refuse to make today. We choose to tread down paths. Attempt and succeed at creating new ones. And when its time to leave, when we look back, what would we be looking back at? Love and laughter, hate and prejudice, tears and anger, joy and contentment, friends and those who could not be friends, family and those who could not be family, friends that became family and family that ceased to be friends. Would we  only see us take ourselves at the end of it all? Or would we even be taking a 'self'? 

What are we supposed to learn from this time we spend here?

And just as I don't have answer to that question, I have no answer to What do I name this post? My eternal search for titles continues.

Met Thalaivar

at Vairamuthu Sir's 1000 paadalgal event. IMO its one of the best events that I have been a part of. Brimming with scholarship and an energy in the air in the room that I day, I haven't felt for a long while. With the titans from the industry, listening to SPB sir and KJY sir sitting at a 1 feet distance from the performance area. Quite an experience. Listening to Vairamuthu sir read out the citations that he gave out to every guest he had invited was another treat. Listening to Vaali sir's address which left us all in splits and Vairamuthu sir's impassioned one, was amazing. Nothing like listening to poets speak. Especially on their craft, their words and their points of view. Anecdotes and stories and laughter and life. 

I first performed with Vijay Prakash that day to a monitor-wise highly uncomfortable rendition. I have met him after more than a year, after performing at the VTV audio launch here in Chennai. Definitely one of the loveliest and nicest performers I have met.  But thankfully it got better by the time I went on stage for Uyire  with Hari ji. And Hari ji actually told me he liked what I sang.  Whatt-an experience listening to him sing Uyire. Its a dang surprise every time. Keeps you on your toes all the time. And he brings edge-of-the-seat entertainment to the music listener I think. 

The vibes that evening were amazing. Nothing discordant anywhere. Annnnnnnnddddd.....

After the Photo Op with the Honble Chief Minister of Tamilnadu, I decided to say Hello to Superstar on Stage. Babbled and said I am huuuge fan. Yep, as original, impressive, smart and of course, original as that. He says "Yeah I know Chinmayi." .. And a few other words that I don't remember. But in my life I will never forget shaking hands with him. In this aspect I am exactly as crazy as every Thalaivar fan out there. The Superstar is all magic and earth-shatteringly simple. When I was an stage I smiled at him while singing Kadhal Anukkal and he smiled back. At that point in time I had no clue whether he knew me from Adam or for that matter, Eve. I knew in less than an hour later that I was mistaken and he knew me by name. Thanks to the cameramen, a million times for capturing that moment. I have a photograph of it now.

The one other thing I will treasure is from the Vairamuthu sir. His words to me, impressed in a sheet of gold. 

Chinna Thenral Nee

Chella Puyalum Nee

Thamizhil Paadum Kuyilum Nee

Vaazhga Chinmayi

- Vairamuthu

The other treasure, the first one this year, is of course, the calendar :) Glee!

The 2011 A R Rahman Foundation Calendar

You can buy the A R Rahman Foundation 2011 Calendar at 

http://cgi.ebay.in/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=170583211833#ht_592wt_1141

and 

http://cgi.ebay.in/A-R-Rahman-foundation-official-calendar-2011-2-pack-/170586283719?pt=LH_DefaultDomain_203&hash=item27b7bc1ec7#ht_610wt_1141

This calendar is something I ll preserve forever, because Rahman sir has given me one with a personalized message and a signature. 

If I were in ancient Egypt and were mummified, for the articles that I would take into the afterlife, this calendar would be on one of the topmost in my list. 

Keeping my pledge for the Kannamma Project

Has been possible thanks to contributions on 16th and 17th December from

Kranthi Kasibhatla 

Shivakumar Narayanan 
Kavitha C

A.S.Arul Susidhar 

Balaganeshkumar P

Subha M

  Deepak Chander

  Kamakshi

  Vinod Prabhu

  Rajan B

  Ravi K Terala

  Subash Thyagarajan

  Adhvika G 

  RK Thanjavur

  Pramod V
J

Dhanasekaran

Narayanan Ravi Chandran 

  Chinmayi Vinayakam

  Karthik Veluchamy

B S Raji 
Sivaramakrishnan Sankaran

Divya Kumar

  Kalyanasundaram

      Vamsi Krishna        
Naveen Varadarajan
Mugil Arunan
Kothai
M Ganesan
Sankaranarayanan Natarajan
Saravanakumar Gopiraj
Nadhinee
Nathan Subramani
Aarthi Subramani
Vijay Chidambaram
Senthilkumar Murugesan
Avinash
Sudarshan Prabu
Manoj MC
Narendra A
C Ganesan
Sundar Andaperumal
Sreekrishnan
Santa Claus
Yogitharani
Muthu
Ajay Vejendla
Guru Prasath
Dhanasekaran
Rajhee Muthukumar
Vijaya Kumar Babu
ITIndia.com
Raj

                            

When I actually signed up for this, I had no clue how this would work, whether I would be able to achieve this through social media and get the word out about NalandaWay and the Kannamma Project. Was a little nervous about keeping the pledge. 

Hardly thought it would be done in 5 days starting from the 13th to before the end of 17th December. I had not asked anyone for funds to support any organization before. Whenever they came to I performed free and helped raise funds and made personal donations whenever possible. There was a standing joke in the community around that C for Charity is also C for Chinmayi. After a point I was giving only charity concerts and kinda also forgot that sometimes charity needs to also begin at home. Jokes apart, the response to the Kannamma project through Twitter, Facebook and also this blog has been heartwarming. 

Once again Thank you to the contributors mentioned in this post and to those in the post below. You all have brightened the lives of so some beautiful girls out there and I wish that every time they smile, the warmth and happiness reaches your heart too. Every time they laugh may the joy find a resonance in your being. And every time their eyes light up, may you have brightness in your vision, literally or figuratively, as you may need it. May your dreams find fulfillment as the dreams of these children which are on their way to it. 

God Bless and I ll tell Santa to pay you guys a visit this Christmas :p

The Kannamma Project of NalandaWay

An American man was telling me a couple of days ago that India is a rich country and there is ability for Indians to pay for a service or make a donation. But the willingness is missing. 

Since the time I blogged about the Kannamma Project or rather, the time I have been tweeting about it, close to 25,000/- INR has been donated to the project in less than 2 days.

Here is my personal Thank you to 

Vijay Krishnan

Arun Vaidyanathan

K Narendra

Ganesh Prabu

Baskar

Venkatramaiah

Bhargavi

Eric Ambroise

Karthikeyan R

Barani Thilak

Veena Vijayan

Hariharan Sambath

Yegna

Yashwant Vijayakumar

Ram 

Ramanan RS
Dinesh Thiagarajan

More on 15/December

Kathiresan Uncle
Rajalakshmi Muthukumarasamy
Maha Durairaj and Family
My Anonymous friend
Shankar Ram Venkatasubramaniam
Brice Robinson
Shreyas
Vijay
Akil
Kalaivanan Kumaran

Though officially I am called the champion of the Kannamma Project to raise the funds for them in addition to the others, you, the ones who have donated are the real champions and the real heroes. 

Thank you for reading my tweet/blog, considering it and going the distance to donate the funds. 

Much much appreciated.

God Bless

Raising funds for NalandaWay's Kannamma Project

Sriram Iyer of Nalanda Way wrote to me asking me to be one of the champions of the Kannamma Project and I was supposed to give him a video too which I could not get myself to do as schedules were tight.  I had heard about him and his work and he had touched base with me on Facebook a few times in the past. Supporting the cause of the marginalized girl child is special to me and since theirs is an art-based rehabilitation program, its special twice over.
"Marginalised girl children who are housed in residential care centres include orphans, juvenile delinquents, children rescued from bonded labour, sex work, conflict areas, refugees, children affected by HIV/ AIDS etc. These children are emotionally disturbed, have been physically abused, are prone to violent behaviour and may have been involved in crimes. They often fare poorly in school, yell or physically fight to handle social conflicts and are highly likely to engage in risky behaviours such as substance use, or unprotected sex. NalandaWay’s arts-based rehabilitation programme has helped such children overcome depression and disruptive behaviour and make successful transitions into the society. The funds raised from this campaign will be utilized for an arts-based rehabilitation programme for marginalised girl children between the ages 12 and 20, in Government Homes in Tamil Nadu. These children would include orphans, destitute, street kids and other girl children from similar situations. This programme includes, arts training, lifeskills development, academic support, vocational training and livelihoods assistance"
This was also something Blue Elephant could be associated with as a part of our own Corporate Social Responsibility and this is a definite start for a lot more to come and to give back to the society and make it a better place than I found it. With foundations like NalandaWay it makes things a little easier.

If you would like to donate and support their cause, kindly click here

Though my pledge is to raise at least 1,00,000/- INR, I would happier if I could raise more for them.


 

The new Toyota Etios AD

And I have been waiting like an excited kid just about to open a present. I sang this ad a couple of weeks ago and to finally sing the Toyota Etios tag line was quite an experience. I was kinda happy that I have also been able to sing an ad for Rahman sir. Something only the cream of singers have been able to do. The luckiest musicians IMO.  Javed Ali and Madhushree have also sung in the track of 4:41 minutes. 

This is the link to ad featuring Rahman sir http://fb.me/PfdYgh0L

And the link to the song. http://www.toyotaetios.in/l1/song.zip

The new Toyota Etios AD

And I have been waiting like an excited kid just about to open a present. I sang this ad a couple of weeks ago and to finally sing the Toyota Etios tag line was quite an experience. I was kinda smiling to myself that I have also been able to sing an ad for Rahman sir. Something only the cream of singers have been able to do. The luckiest musicians IMO.  Javed Ali and Madhushree have also sung in the track of 4:41 minutes. 

This is the link to ad featuring Rahman sir http://fb.me/PfdYgh0L

And the link to the song. http://www.toyotaetios.in/l1/song.zip

The Blue Elephant receives an Award

of Excellence from the SAARC Chamber for Women Entrepreneurship. The ceremony was this evening and it was a completely different experience for me meeting women from the SAARC nations and other awardees this evening, all wonderful ladies, 12 of them from India, Maldives, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Bhutan, Bangladesh and Sri Lanka and Nepal.

Also heard that a lot more people in Pakistan had watched me in Chote Ustaad and also said they missed me in the show. Something I also got to learn from Ms Tina Sahni when I went to Hyderabad to perform for the Hindu November Fest. Somehow, Pakistan does not understand the fabled North-South divide :D 

Nonetheless, receiving the award from the President of SAARC Chamber, Mr Huq, Consul General of the US Embassy Mr Simkin, Ms Indira Dutt of KPC, Ms Vinita Singhania of J K Lakshmi Cements was special. And for the first time, my mom told me she was proud of me.This was not an award that I ever thought I will get.

I started Blue Elephant on an over-fortnight decision thanks to a friend who told us to start the company watching what I was already doing as an individual. Blue Elephant, from then on, has grown, slowly and steadily. Clients have come in through references from one MNC to another. And they have stayed with us in all these years. I guess somewhere we have made the cut and have given our clients what they wanted.

We begin our training division very soon and are also in the process of tying up certain loose ends which did happen. The Blue Elephant has also not had a very easy journey. But thankfully God has been great and has helped us identify the right people and the wrong people at the right time. 

My thanks go out to every one of the linguists (in Spain, USA, Argentina, Mexico, Poland, Denmark, Norway, Hungary, Turkey, Kuwait, Maldives, Burma, Finland, Iceland, France, Germany, Italy , Latvia, Lithuania, Australia, China, Japan, Thailand, Korea, the Czech Republic, Russia,  Greece, Egypt, South Africa and the United Kingdom) that I have worked with and their excellent work. If not for them the company would not have come this far. My company is what it is because of them, their talent, sincerity and work ethics.

My thanks also go to my clients who have been with me, have stood by me and have also helped me in removing a weed or two, when they did crop up. 

To Mrs Padmhasini, Partner, Blue Elephant and my mother for all the support and taking care of the operations.

My thanks to Amudhan of WOC , Abhishek Shah and Sandeep Makam of BePositive24 who gave my company its name and the logo. Also thanks to Amudhan for telling me why I should go with this name. That I love the elephant is a totally different thing altogether.

To BePositive24 for being a constant support through the journey.

To all the well-wishers for your good wishes and sending me the positive energy that drowns out the negativity that I sometimes have to face. 

Thank you.

And to you I wish that you have several moments of happiness, success and support that you need and may it come to you from every direction so that you may realize the dreams. May you also make new dreams and also achieve successes in areas where you least expected. May you be happy and may your cup of joy overflow.

Concerts and experiences

and performing at Hyderabad, Coimbatore and Bangalore was fulfilling, satisfying to say the least. So many members of the audience shouting out to us that this is the best evening that they have ever had and to us, that was music to our ears. We kept up our tradition of making the audience that reads The Hindu dance. And they are amazing sports. A lot of fun and not really much of the stiff-upper-lip types as they are portrayed to be. The audience also sang along several times. That's a lovely experience to be a part of. I hardly expected people to know me in Bangalore but they did. Some people in the audience asked me to sing Ghazals yesterday and since it was not supposed to be in the format of the show, decided to give it a skip. Yesterday was my first concert in Bangalore.

More importantly I had this wonderful breakfast session on the day of the concert at Coimbatore that lasted 4 hours. Not much eating but amazing conversation to be a part of, more as a listener. If we but listen, there is a lot that people want to say. And sometimes I wish and pray that the aural tradition that we are famous for in India, through which most of our culture, traditions and arts have been passing down generation after generation does not take a break thanks to the impatience and busy-ness of our times.

The trip to Bangalore was quite an experience to say the least. Since Coimbatore and Bangalore concerts were scheduled on consecutive days it was kinda hectic. Then the flight from Coimbatore to Bangalore got canceled. We decided to take the road to meet with a Road-roko ome 50 kms off Krishnagiri and were stalled for over 45 minutes and then a little bit of panic set in. Mom got down and literally haath-jodkar asked people to give way so that we could go. We were the last to be let before they completely blocked the highway, for God knows how long.

We reached the concert hall 20 minutes before the scheduled start and the car containing my clothes hadn't arrived. Bangalore being the city it is, you lose the way, you are a gone-case. 5 minutes before scheduled start the suitcase arrived and I had a two-song headstart with Srini sir beginning the concert. 

Mahalakshmi Iyer, a singer I have always wanted to perform with was a part of the Bangalore show.  She shared so many anecdotes and experiences that are possible only at such concert settings. She is an amazing person.
When I joined the audience in the hall to sing along toward the end, some of them took away my mic. One member of the audience came on stage, took my mic and finished singing an the entire song of Chin Chin chu and I was quite amused by the entire goings-on. 

I had to drive back to Chennai last night as I had to speak at the plenary  session of the SAARC Chamber Council for Women Entrepreneurs this morning. I met some outstanding ladies like Ms Gariyali, IAS Officer,  Ms Rasheeda  Bhagat of the Hindu Businessline, Ms Janaki Pillai of Ability Foundation, Ms Indira Dutt of KCP Ltd, Ms Rajyalakshmi Rao who has been with the District forum, State and National commissions for Consumer Redressal, Ms Rohini, Ms Sharon Apparao of Apparao Galleries and Ms Radha Parthasarathy who has done some amazing work at Thandalam.

More than anything else, the HNF concerts have given me memories to cherish, absolutely good music from some stellar musicians from Kerala and Chennai and lovely times. 

Hectic activity ahead for Blue Elephant ahead and I totally looking forward to it.

To sum it all up, Musafir Hoon Yaaron... Mujhe Chalte Jaana hai.. Bas.... Chalte jaana!

What I sometimes do in my spare time

is bake. The obsession started sometime earlier this year. And have been baking away. Bought a small oven and then bought a bigger one, with whatever sad contraptions that are available in the name of convection ovens (not microwave) in Chennai.

My mother was mostly complaining that I would never step into the kitchen except of course to make tea or coffee and then suddenly baking started. Coming to think of it, I don't know when and how I started off with this. Maybe a friend goaded me into it. And that was the beginning of this hobby. Yes, I think the credit goes to her and she said lets bake this weekend.  And we first tried a chocolate fudge microwave oven cake. Which came out well enough since we followed a microwave oven recipe. But figured microwave ovens, even if they have the convection mode are not designed for serious baking at all. 

And I have fallen hook, line and sinker into this hobby. Eggless baking mind you. Which meant checking out all the vegan baking books and just checking out what they do instead of eggs. And next calling friends over and asking them to try this and try that.

Breads and cakes and cookies and now icecream. Finally invested in a Kitchenaid stand mixer and its attachment when I went to Canada. And its fun. My mom however, still thinks this is a temporary obsession. And I think twice before baking cookies in this Sunflame OTG. But I figured the world really has not come to thinking of freestanding ovens for people like me. Friends of mine who have also recently taken to this dont want to get into the headache of calling their carpenter and redesigning kitchens for the sake of this. And though we want to fly high in baking wonderland, we find our wings clipped. Oh, the woes! :p

Nevertheless, to you, I'd suggest you try some sort of a food preparation except instant food, of course. I am sure doing this on a daily basis is ho-hum. But check out baking. Its quite a wonderful experience.

After quite a sabbatical from reading, I finished a couple of books in two days. Dreams in Prussian Blue and No God in Sight. Though I am no fan of fiction, I was drawn to reading Dreams... when a friend told me the story, seamlessly and in one flow. These two are page turners. Have 'Bombay' as the backdrop. 

And for me, they are slightly gloomy. but I loved reading them nonetheless. Loved the narrative. 

Nothing can be truer than the fact that books open up vistas you never knew existed or sometimes just become peep holes. Peepholes that could lead you to opening the door or just say OKThxBai, I'd rather not cross the threshold into whatever lies beyond that door. The mystery or maybe fear of not knowing what is beyond. And the fear that we could actually get lost in the nothingness of it all and horror of horrors, even like it, finally. 

Looking out of the window into a rain-washed city now that is trying to find some warmth and those who go on the roads wish, that the sun that peeps through the clouds would miraculously vacuum out the slush and murky brown and grey waters on the road and that their clothes could be saved the assault. We go here and there, rush about with this and that, lead the lives we lead, believing and kidding ourselves that it all has a purpose, when there is actually none, perhaps. All this, for what? The questions that has loomed heavily and largely over our heads, over our beings. And then we try and erase it frantically like a kid that wipes out mathematics theorems from the blackboard, wishing that it can be blotted out until the next fateful hour the next day. 

And we derive happiness and sadness, confusing purpose or the lack of it from all this transitoriness. Contemplate unsettlingly about all this, but go back to the familiar, and comfortable familiarity of that which has been done for aeons. Because it is easy to lapse into familiar drudgery than explore the scary beyond that we know nothing about. What if we actually see nothing, hear nothing and know nothing? Would we be happy that we started out in the first place?

Its easy being who we are. Doing the things we do. Singing the next song, humming the next tune, doing our next degree, working up the next rung in the cliched corporate ladder, lah-di-dah. 

And while I thought about all this, the phone rings for me to give a sound-byte to a radio station. 

Next up - Coimbatore and Bangalore.

The show in Hyderabad was amazing to say the least. I was performing there for the first time and also perhaps the first time with Shwetha Mohan. Only thing, this was a concert for which I had absolutely no rehearsal. My travel plans upset a lot of things. And on the day of the show, the flight had to be diverted to Bangalore instead of Hyderabad and I landed late. And hence missed the rehearsal that was happening that morning. Just got to check a couple of songs, during the sound check. But that was about it. Over and above that, battling an oncoming cold and a throat infection and making sure that it does not get worse.... But then that's the story of our lives.
Post the show, when I got tweets from some people saying that it was the best concert that they had attended in their 23 years in Hyderabad, I felt completely gratified. We had the audience dancing with us for the final couple of numbers. I happened to spot Anuj Gurwara in the audience and asked him to join us on stage. Strangely he had just messaged another friend of mine a couple of minutes before I called him up, that he wished that he could be on stage with us. Talk of immediate wish fulfillment :) He rocked it too. 

I had amazing stage monitors, again a rarity these days, though I wonder why. Once we know how we sound everything is a breeze. Otherwise its a total disaster.

Performing at the Corporation Kalaiarangam on the 26th and the next day, the 27th at Bangalore Jnana Jyoti Convention Center. This will also be my first concert in Bangalore and am completely looking forward to the experience.

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The Hindu November Fest

And I am a part of it yet again. This time round we are performing Hindi Retro Numbers in Hyderabad, Bangalore and Coimbatore.

November 14th at Ravindra Bharathi, Public Garden Road, Saifabad, Hyderabad- 500004,

November 26th at Coimbatore: Corporation Kalaiarangam, R.S. Puram, Coimbatore.

November 27th Bangalore: Jnana Jyothi Convention Centre, Central College Campus, Bangalore.

I will be performing with Srinivas sir, Haricharan and Shwetha Mohan. Mahalakshmi Iyer would be performing at Bangalore alone. And am soo looking forward to this series once again.

You can see the rest of the line-up and buy tickets here

And as they say, Let the Music Begin!

New Releases - Engeyum Kadhal

Quite a few lately in Telugu Kannada and Tamil. Shopping Mall in Telugu, Minnal Minnum and a few more plus a song that I have been looking forward to ever since the day I recorded it. In Engeyum Kaadhal composed by Harris sir.
I sing with Harish Raghavendra after quite a while. One of our memorable duets was Noothana from this film called Karka Kasadara.
After singing this song, I felt in love with the world and yes that is quite a possible feeling. Working with Harris sir has been wonderful. Especially after Varayo and thanks to that song most of the awards were given to me, all credit and thanks to him. I can safely say a few more people began liking my work after this song. The audio is said to hit the stores tomorrow and the teasers that I have heard so far does not feature my voice. Teased me enough as far as I am concerned.
Also worked with Madhan Karky, the illustrious son of Vairamuthu sir in this song. Remember him walking in and was wondering who this college-goer was. Turns out he does go to University, but to teach! He happens to be a professor at Anna University. Lovely lyrics and he was also teaching us some new things about the iPad which had just come in at that time. After the recording, I also heard a few other songs of the album and a singer that is introduced anew is Aalaap Raju. He is a really good guitarist but makes his debut as a singer with this one. After I heard the songs I asked Harris sir how soon the album would release and all he did was give his trademark giggle. Soon, is all he could say. I loved listening to album and hope you do too.

Travels and music

If there is something called deafening silence, I heard it at Canada. All the time. Silence so loud that it wants to make its presence felt in your ears every milisecond of the moment. A silence so silent that you wish it would break the spell itself. The winter silence perhaps. Or perhaps the country as not so populated and milling with crowds and their melange of various thoughts through the day. Also because of the timing of my flight or whatever the reason may be, the thought kept coming to my head, while traveling to Canada, I was chasing sunset and on my way back home, I was chasing sunrise. A lot more times these days, I find myself silent and observant rather than wanting to speak. 

Anyway, that apart, I performed Kilimanjaro for the first time overseas at Canada with a really amazing head-dress that the group Agni had got for me.

Just so happened that they had made it in blue and it just so happened that it matched my clothes to a tee. Synchronicity or what!
The show was really well put together and I loved my sojourn there and finally made my way back to enough and more noise, typical Diwali style, even at the middle of the night back home :)
A lot more coming up. And Soon !

Endhiran Songs Special

Was telecast for the on SUN TV yesterday and in case you didn't catch it, here are the links pertaining to Pudhiya Manidha and Kilimanjaro
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2G32f-buhd8&feature=player_embedded#!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PGCWCUM9ZtA&feature=player_embedded


For me, the surprising thing of this feature, is though I had no clue when Javed had shot and when I had shot. But we seem to be on the same pitch! Just noticed.... Ah well! Good to be on the same note!

Performing at Canada - 30 and 31 October, International Center

So many days since the last post and so much has happened. Tweeting kinda steals the thunder from blogging. From watching the FDFS of Endhiran to being in Canada now for a concert its been an eventful 3 weeks. 

Last month when I had traveled to Hyderabad to receive the SouthScope award for Best Female Playback Singer, Anushka Shetty and Director Krish made the moment extra special. Meeting Anushka was one of the best parts of the trip. 

Have started dubbing for a couple of films and shall update here in this space later, when it is time for release. 

Being on Sanjay Pinto's Chennai Speaks Out was an amazing experience for me, especially in the company of Sri Sudhangan and Sri Gnani. Though I have known of them, I met them for the first time thanks to the show and I learnt a heaven of a lot of things. So many things from history that they quoted and shared on and off the show. A lot about music and composers. They both are like encyclopaedia. Also met Mr Sreedhar Pillai of TOI thanks to the show, a highly knowledgeable person and senior journalist. A lot of times, I have heard my mother say that the generation today lacks the advantage of satsangati. Of being in the presence of exalted and intellectual company where all that we need to do is keep both eyes and ears open. There would be so much to learn, through the Karna Parampara. The Parampara or the lineage of the ear. Of listening. God has been kind by providing me such experiences and I hunger for more. The other day, in Mumbai I was fixing the strings of my Sarangi and I ran into a senior classical musician. And heard him speak on the traditions of music. Could not be help be enraptured. If we but listen there is so much to learn. 

Vijayadasami was a wonderful day and a day that I will cherish in my fondest memories. A reinforcement that dreams come true. Even if it were only a wish. Had started losing hope on certain things but a beam of light does shine through to show hope. And there comes the reason to hang on, again. 

Was also a part of the Director's Union D40 event, celebrating 40 years of the Directors Union. Listening to Mrs Radhika Sarathkumar's speech had the entire audience rolling in laughter. The lady is brave as a lioness. But I am not willing to reveal too much here basically because I do not want to be a killjoy.

As for me I am just looking forward to performing this weekend at the International Center in Toronto. And perhaps get some stuff for my new found passion in baking. Canada and US being Baking-ingredients-wonderlands that they are!! Wondering if I should also let my hosts to experience the result of my baking, which I assure you are pretty decent, eggless and all. The friends that have eaten my baking creations are all alive well, healthy and have remained so from the moment they ingested it. Thank God for small mercies :p 

But jokes apart, really love this hobby. If you don't bake, maybe you should try it sometime? Its good fun!

ENNNNNNNDHIRAAAAAAA

The voice of Hariharan ji singing that word kept echoing in my head for the past couple of days until this morning. Caught the show at 8 AM, or rather intended to. Which started late. And then there was another technical glitch, which made the lot of some 300 in that particular screen enjoy two intervals. One intended by the director and the other totally not :)

Maybe because of the screen I watched it in, the audience were a little less evocative about shouting out to thalaivar. But I guess the point is the movie kept us so darn engrossed that we forgot a lot of things. More than anything, there were no punch dialogues. And hence no chance to shout out. Could not help feeling slightly emotional when I saw Kilimanjaro on screen. Silent thanks went out to Rahman sir.

Nothing compares the experience of watching a thalaivar film on the first day. Its almost like a festival, methinks. Only that eppo varum epdi varum nu sollavae mudiyaadhu!

Right after the film I went into NDTV for their Endhiran special, wherein they interviewed several technicians that were part of the project. Mr Sanjay Pinto was kind enough to spend some time and had a great time catching up with him. It was amazing to learn how the media helps maintain peace and calm in a country. For all the media bashing that I have seen and heard, there is a lot more than meets the eye.

As or Endhiran, Whattttte film is all I will and can say. Friends of mine have caught 3 shows of it already at various theatres. Have fun. Its truly a spectacle and complete paisa vasool.

TEDxChennai on October 10 2010

Less than two weeks and I have been looking forward to this since last year to be honest, the minute TEDxChennai Edition 1 wrapped up and everyone posed for pictures.
I went to a couple of the organizers meetings this time whenever I could and hope to be of help to the committee as much as I can.
Being a part of that event was a full day of positive energy and to you, I would suggest, or rather urge you to be a part of the audience. Its a day well invested.
Book your tickets here at http://www.TEDxChennai.com

Jhootha Hi Sahi

Have sung Maiyya Yashoda (The Jamuna Mix and The Thames mix) in this album with Javed Ali and this recording session was one that I would never forget. I met Mr Tyrewala for the second time and it was a wonderful experience to be a part of this recording. Javed Ali recorded this song while his mother was getting a surgery done in Delhi so it was quite hectic for him.

Rahman sir told me to sing and sound the way I do in this song. Like a really young girl, not that I am a hag now, but still, to bring in the chirpiness of a younger girl. 

Meeting Mr Tyrewala was like meeting a really wonderful professor and listening to a wonderful address. Not sure if he would take it as a compliment but in the conversation that I had with him, I had a great time listening to him on philosophy and his interpretation of some of the myths and legends of India to the best way to eat waffles. He is most definitely a food aficionados and remember him mentioning about a really wonderful Chinese restaurant in Shimla, if I am not mistaken. Like Vir Sanghvi, he also said that the Chinese food that we eat in India is not Chinese.

Needless to say some of the best conversations that I have had are with the creative people, the wonderful people that are part of the process of making the films that we love to watch. I have not met too many people in the literary and art world yet but hopefully that will lead me to some wonderful learning as well. 

Like this time I met Mr Iqbal Patni, the poet and heard him speak, albeit briefly on cars, which one to buy and which one not to. 

To me, singing for and working under Rahman sir is like being in a Himalayan ashram with a Guru. There is tranquility and somehow even if I have had a really terrible day, everything just vanishes, as far as I am concerned, as soon as I meet him. His hours of rigorous spiritual practice and communion with the Almighty has this effect on other people I would daresay. Someday, I hope to have the same sort of a positive effect on the people that I meet.

Enjoy the album and you can listen to it on http://www.saregama.com and when you do want to download, please make it legal.

Thanks and God Bless.

Each of us has a gift I feel. Someone told me that music is the language of the Gods and to be able to speak it is a blessing in itself. And also that same someone told me that I am here to amuse the Gods. Though there are times when I look skywards, because eventhough the Supreme Being is all pervading and everywhere, thoonilum-thurumbilum types and all that, it just is instinctive to look skywards for some reason whenever I feel like conversing with this person who thinks I am for his amusement and tell him (and please, "How do you know its a 'HIM'" is cliched), that maybe while its good he is being amused, I actually do not find all the goings on funny. And maybe he can work on my amusement once in a while. 

At a time when there is mostly silence all around me but for this amazing composition that I choose to play that wafts, entwines through every cell in the air around me, seeping it with a flavour, a fragrance that when I look at this curtain rippling near me by the window, I wonder if it is the breeze or the notes. Ah well, that's just me being romantic. 

The past couple of days I have been a part of an amazingly beautiful creative process. Attempted singing a song that is quite drenched in Carnatic classical expression. And learnt so much through it all. We meet so many people, are drained through some meetings, exhilarated by some, tired of some, some affect us and some do not even have the effect like maybe a baby's breath may have on a lock of hair. The past couple of days, has left me grateful for being born as me. Thankful for the people I meet. Especially for the songs I get to sing. And this amazing veteran composer and a gentleman that I have met and have got to know. 

God does exist around us. He is someone with a piquant sense of humour. He exists in the people that we meet. And there are times when he comes through. And for the agnostics and atheists, look at it as some sort of a magic. Inexplicable, enigmatic and lovely. 

At times that I sing, its almost like something reaches out to me and a sense of peace and serenity settles in me.  I felt like that the past couple of days. When the time is right, I shall tell you which song I am talking about.

At this time, I feel like diving into deep blue sky. 

For you, I wish that you go through this enough number of times, revel in it, get drenched in it to the  very nucleus of every cell of your being.  Enough number of times. Like you closing your eyes and smiling a smile that magnifies a million times in your mind's eye. To feel the love, peace and beauty of this thing called life. For you, I wish that you find your gift that is a part of you. Become one with it and let it find expression in you. Love yourself, love and give freely.

Tathaastu and God bless.

Vinayaka Chaturthi special on Isaiaruvi

For those of you that asked me for the link.
Hope you all had a wonderful Ganesh Chaturthi. Ganpati Bappa Morya!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u10Qj9y5ruw&feature=player_embedded
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-CuWjwjNRvI&feature=player_embedded#!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ThnNiGpWA5I&feature=player_embedded#!

Meera

I am the voice of this new sitcom on Vijay TV which shall telecast Monday through Thursday at 20:00. I guess this would be the first title song that I have sung in Vijay TV
Hope you guys enjoy the show as well. 

Have been listening to some music from Pakistan and Punjab. And am blown away by the beauty of the lyrics. 

And the more I listen to some notes that come from some musicians the more I see the musician and his song are so entwined with each other that maybe after a point, for me, I do not see the two different entities. The song becomes the songster. The songster becomes the song. 

The beauty of the words that have been strung together by fingers holding a pen or, if I may be dreamy, a quill perhaps, with fingers stained dark from the ink. Maybe like the delicate fingers that play on a stringed instrument, where long after the notes have ceased to resonate, the strings have left a mark  on the fingers that played them out. I also wonder how did the poets who were men understand the sentiment of a woman, especially the wedding songs of Punjab, so much that he goes to describe how she would feel when she leaves her father's home.

I, was thinking today that I am blessed to be born a musician more than anything else. And so thankful that I was not born a Gandu who did not understand notes or tones. Or music at all. 

The Sufi, it is said, pehle hi sab kucch haar ke aata hai. That he has already lost everything. He has lost his people, his home, his wealth, his mind even, in search of the Ultimate One. In search of the One with whom he could be one with for eternity. For the One whom he pines for. The same way Meera pined. Or how Aandal pined.

(At this point I remember how there are times that I pine for a good monitor on stage. That's a different sort of pining altogether, anyway :) )

I wish today, that some day I'll sing like the Sufi. Or I be like Meera or Aandal.

And to you, the reader (not sure if you can sing or play or an instrument), I wish for you that you experience the pure emotion of your eyes welling up as an expression of that which wells up within you. Like maybe, a beautiful flowery creeper that twines around your soul and squeezes it enough to make you shed tears but leaves you with a fragrance that you could get a whiff of, every time you close your eyes. Its a wonderful feeling. May you also pine for something but I won't wish that for too long for you though, and may you get what you pine for, if that makes you happy. May you be joyous.

May you be blessed, on this Krishna Jayanti. May Lord Krishna bless you.

Tathaaastu.